"The Darker Sooner"
By Catherine Wing
Then came the darker sooner,
came the later lower.
We were no longer a sweeter-here
happily-ever-after. We were after ever.
We were farther and further.
More was the word we used for harder.
Lost was our standard-bearer.
Our gods were fallen faster,
and fallen larger.
The day was duller, duller
was disaster. Our charge was error.
Instead of leader we had louder,
instead of lover, never. And over this river
broke the winter’s black weather.
An inescapable despair is evoked by "The Darker Sooner." Everything has transformed from delightful to disgusting. Catherine Wing carries the words to a darker, emptier place which is "father and further" from "happily-ever-after" and closer to "disaster." The poet introduces the sense of change during the first couple of lines which mandates an unwilling hopelessness.
I think your note is very well written, but it is a little bit short.
ReplyDeletePretty good, but probably would be better if you were to go more in depth into the ideas, if possible.
ReplyDeleteThis is good, but a little short. With more length you could create more depth on the claim. Could also fix some spelling errors, but overall pretty good.
ReplyDeleteIt is good what you have, but you should go a little more in depth with the analysis. Good rough draft.
ReplyDeleteNicely written but you might want to add some stuff to make it longer. You might want to add even more quotes and go farther in depth to explain and talk about them.
ReplyDeleteGood ideas and good use of quotes, but try and combine sentences together if you can; it will help the paragraph flow better. Good!
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